My First Year of Running
I was reviewing some old files and found this that I wrote. I thought it would be fun to share.
My first year of running:
Day 1 – decide to start running to get in shape, maybe run a few 5Ks.
Day 2 – I should start with new shoes. Head to a running store called Kmart. Can’t decide between the blue ones or the red ones. Hmm, never heard of this Asics brand. Must be some cheap store brand. Ask my 5 year old. Ok, go with the blue ones.
Day 3 & 4 – well it is the weekend, guess I’ll I start on Monday. Need to cut the grass anyway. Wonder if I should wear the new shoes and break them in?
Day 5 – Ok, got on the new blue shoes my dd picked out for me, my driving sun glasses, the ironed cotton shorts and t-shirt from the bottom of my draw, and the new $1.50 socks (for 10 pair). Here we go. Huff, Puff, Wheez, Puff, Huff,…..holy S$%^%*&, Puff, Ouch, Puff……… Great, done. Never realized how long the driveway was.
Day 10 – 15. Out with shin splints.
Day 30 – Yeah, 2 miles today. Man that was tough. Find out later that this course had 1050’ of elevation change. No wonder I had to stop 82 times. You mean hills make a difference?
Month 3 – Feeling good. Mileage is up to a whopping 15mpw. I can now run 4 miles straight, uhm, except ones with hills. Man, I am a runner – not like one of those, heh, joggers I see out there.
Month 4 – My first 5K. Looking around before the gun goes off. These people are toast, I’ve been training. Wonder how big my trophy is. Think I’ll stay next to this old guy. Look at him. His shoes are older than me. Piece of cake. Think I’ll just string him along a while.
Gun goes off. – Holy c$%&p, where the heck did the old guy go? Man, where did EVERYONE go?
2 hours later as I cross the finish line with the timer and shoot no longer there – I think it is time to quit.
Month 6 – Humbled with a few 5Ks under my belt. Mileage is up to 25mpw now. Long run is 5 miles….with some “hills”. Wearing my race t-shirts everywhere so everyone knows “I am a runner”.
Month 7 – My first 10k. Ok, I am smarter now. Oh, there is that old guy again. Not going to make that mistake twice. Gun goes off – doing OK, able to stay with the 5 year old. Hey, the old guy isn’t that far ahead. Hmm. After hill 1 at mile 2 – I can still see him. Wow, I must have talent! I just needed a little training. After hill 2 at mile 4 – He must just be over the hill (Note – he is already finished, changed and having a bagel with cream cheese with the people he has been running with for 40 years). Finishing time – 92 minutes. Not bad.
Month 8 – Honey, what do you mean I need to start running at 6AM! It’s f$%^kin -5F outside at that time. So the kids needed to walk home a few times. Oh, she graduated? OK, I’ll try.
Month 8 + 1 day – Out the door at 6:30AM wearing cotton sweat pants, a t-shirt, sweatshirt, sweater and winter coat. No hat, no gloves. 1 hour later I have soaked through all of my clothing, but lost my fingers, ear tips and assorted other body parts due to frostbite.
Month 9 – getting smarter. Now have technical gear. Miles up to 35 and long run of 8. Think it is time to train for a HM. First long run ends up in the emergency room. Dr. I don’t know why my nipples are bleeding. Am I going to die? Ohw, that hurts! What the heck is Body Glide and where do I get it?
Month 10 – scabs on nipples and missing 3 toe nails, but my long run is up to 15 miles and I have learned which courses have the girl runners with the nice legs. I no longer consider myself a runner, but aspire to be one some day. Started a HM plan by some guy name pfizler or something like that. Crazy stuff. Run 1 mile one day and 3245 miles another day. What’s with that? What the heck is VO2max and does Threshold mean just before you puke?
Month 11 – now understand what VO2max is along with 451 other technical terms. Need a computer program to organize the zillion running web sites I have been searching. My legs are like tree stumps, but my arms are like twigs. I have my Italian family convinced that I have some sort of disease. My pants are always falling down and they don’t make a size small enough for me for my age. My doctor kept changing the heart monitor, because he thinks the one he has is broken. I now get up at 5AM. I am hooked.
Month 12 – The HM is only 1 month away and I am starting to think about tackling a FM. My confidence is building. My long runs are getting easier and I have been able to tackle the 2 mile mountain (once). I know enough to know I know nothing. I will listen to Pfitzinger, Daniels, Higdon and others. I just hope that old guy doesn’t show up.